Shire Bosses

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Shire Bosses The Unofficial Department of the Coffs Coast. Independent local media, satire and public-interest research. Part local news. Part group chat. No formal authority.

Several files remain open. Nothing has been resolved.

JESUS CHRIST. IT'S B1.He died for our sins. B1's returned to collect the outstanding balance.One lamb. Zero miracles. No...
24/10/2026

JESUS CHRIST. IT'S B1.

He died for our sins. B1's returned to collect the outstanding balance.

One lamb. Zero miracles. No refunds.

The Department confirms he is not the Messiah.

Just a banana with a payment plan.

Matthew 24:5

INDEPENDENT. TERMS AND CONDITIONS APPLY.Well, well, well. Look what Councillor Tony Judge has dragged into the daylight....
23/10/2026

INDEPENDENT. TERMS AND CONDITIONS APPLY.

Well, well, well. Look what Councillor Tony Judge has dragged into the daylight.

A Nationals-branded email shared ahead of the Coffs Harbour by-election appears to be rallying volunteers to help elect an "Independent candidate" who supports their:

"Standards, beliefs and EXPECTATIONS."

Fu***ng hell. That last word deserves its own investigation.

An independent candidate. Nationals volunteers handing out the how-to-votes. A candidate expected to support the party's standards, beliefs and expectations.

Independent of what, exactly? The logo?

Now, political party members supporting an independent candidate isn't automatically illegal. Nobody is suggesting otherwise.

But there are some bloody obvious questions.

Who is this mystery independent? Who's organising their campaign? Who's paying for the how-to-vote material? Are they a Nationals member? And what happens when their independent judgement doesn't quite match those all-important expectations?

Because there's a difference between supporting someone's independence and expecting their compliance.

The voters of Coffs Harbour deserve to know what political relationships sit behind the candidates asking for their votes.

The by-election is on 12 December.

THE DEPARTMENT WOULD LIKE TO REMIND EVERYONE THAT INDEPENDENCE IS NOT A PARTY ACCESSORY.

Thanks to Councillor Tony Judge for sharing the document.

SHIRE BOSSES has not independently authenticated the original email.

The Department will be examining the paperwork.

VOTE 1 SHIRE BOSSES.

YOU'VE TRIED THE PROFESSIONALS.

At least our bu****it is publicly disclosed.

15/10/2026

Tormena via TSM

We understand Coles is responding by putting a photo of a banana tree next to the empty shelves and charging $9.99 for t...
14/10/2026

We understand Coles is responding by putting a photo of a banana tree next to the empty shelves and charging $9.99 for the experience.

Woolgoolga Woolies has installed an entire banana plantation indoors.Your move Coles.
13/10/2026

Woolgoolga Woolies has installed an entire banana plantation indoors.

Your move Coles.

SHIRE BOSSES CONSIDERS RUNNING FOR COFFS HARBOUR COUNCILOne bloke nominated us in a Facebook comment section.Four minute...
13/10/2026

SHIRE BOSSES CONSIDERS RUNNING FOR COFFS HARBOUR COUNCIL

One bloke nominated us in a Facebook comment section.

Four minutes later, the Department had declared a landslide, established a campaign committee and begun arguing over ministerial portfolios.

No policies have been costed. No qualifications have been checked. Confidence is extraordinarily high.

Our credentials include investigating moths, monitoring suspicious eggs and maintaining an unhealthy interest in council minutes.

Council meetings would be livestreamed with comments enabled. Every pothole would receive an incident number, three internal referrals and a resolution date conveniently beyond the next election.

The Jetty Foreshores would be referred to a Community Listening Department, staffed by one person and a suggestion box.

The Big Banana would become Minister for Tourism following a nationwide recruitment process in which nobody else was interviewed.

B1 would oversee Community Operations. B2 would lead the Independent Commission into B1. Both have denied wrongdoing.

Public consultation would be mandatory. Acting on it would remain optional.

We promise transparency, accountability and absolutely no idea what we're doing.

At least we're admitting it before the election.

THE FORMER MAYOR HAS WALKED.THE MAJORITY REMAINS.Well, f**k.Former Coffs Harbour mayor Paul Amos has resigned from Counc...
13/10/2026

THE FORMER MAYOR HAS WALKED.

THE MAJORITY REMAINS.

Well, f**k.

Former Coffs Harbour mayor Paul Amos has resigned from Council, saying he doesn't want to be associated with some of its outcomes.

After a decade in local government, he's had enough. Amos says Council's decision not to oppose residential development at the Jetty Foreshores was a factor.

But this isn't just about the Jetty.

According to the Mid North Coaster, Amos has regularly found himself in the minority on divisive issues since the 2024 election, up against five councillors who often vote together.

Now he's gone.

The five are still there.

His resignation makes a statement. It doesn't reverse a decision, break a voting bloc or change who holds the numbers.

One less dissenting voice. Same majority.

So who actually benefits? And what happens when an elected representative decides there's no point staying?

Amos isn't above scrutiny. His own record deserves examination too.

But a former mayor saying Council lacks the constructive, collaborative culture needed to serve its community is no routine resignation.

It's a serious criticism of the institution he once led, delivered while major decisions about Coffs Harbour's future are on the table.

The mayor and general manager have publicly thanked Amos for his service.

A vacancy now needs to be filled. Even if a by-election changes who occupies the seat, the existing five-councillor majority would retain the numbers, assuming its members continue voting together.

One councillor has left the building.

The decisions haven't.

The Department will be examining the voting records, the Jetty Foreshores decisions and what this means for the balance of power.

Coffs Harbour deserves more than an explanation of who's leaving.

It deserves an explanation of who's running the show.

STATUS: ONE SEAT VACANT. QUESTIONS REMAIN.

NSW GOVERNMENT DECLARES JETTY FORESHORE CONSULTATION A SUCCESS AFTER COMMUNITY FAILS TO CHANGE ITS MIND.The people of Co...
12/10/2026

NSW GOVERNMENT DECLARES JETTY FORESHORE CONSULTATION A SUCCESS AFTER COMMUNITY FAILS TO CHANGE ITS MIND.

The people of Coffs Harbour have spoken.

The NSW Government has listened.

The NSW Government will now proceed.

After eight years of community engagement, the Jetty Foreshore revitalisation process has reached another milestone in the extraordinary administrative art of recording disagreement.

On 14 September 2024, Coffs Harbour electors were asked whether some Jetty Foreshore land should be used for multi-level private residential development.

33,161 voted NO.

That's 68.68 per cent of formal votes.

The poll was advisory and not legally binding on the State Government. It was also a specific question about private residential development, not a vote against every form of foreshore revitalisation.

The State Government then held a separate public exhibition of its proposed rezoning in May and June 2025.

Of 1,724 submissions received, the reported breakdown was 1,054 opposed, 613 supported and 57 expressing no position.

The Government considered the submissions, amended parts of the proposal and, on 2 October 2026, announced the rezoning had been finalised.

The final controls continue to permit private residential development, with buildings between two and six storeys and an indicative mix including approximately 250 homes and 200 tourist accommodation rooms.

Rezoning is not development approval. Individual proposals will still require further assessment.

Naturally, the Department has responded by proposing an entirely fictional six-storey COFFS HARBOUR COMMUNITY LISTENING CENTRE.

A waterfront monument to the successful collection, processing and filing of public opinion.

Inside, visitors will find:

The WE HEARD YOU exhibition, where objections are converted into PDFs and stored in a folder marked COMMUNITY ENGAGEMENT.

The AFFORDABLE IN PERPETUITY experience, where visitors enjoy three minutes of affordable housing before being escorted into the remaining 97 per cent of the exhibition.

The COMMUNITY FIRST café, serving $14 sourdough, $8 coffees and complimentary submission forms.

And the Centre's signature attraction:

THE CONSULTATION EXPERIENCE.

A private booth.

Two buttons.

YES.

NO.

Press either.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR FEEDBACK.

YOUR RESPONSE HAS BEEN RECORDED.

The result remains unchanged.

To be clear, the Government did consult. It did make changes. Some residents support the development, and there are legitimate competing arguments about the future of the foreshore.

Consultation does not legally require a government to adopt the majority position.

But it does raise a question worth asking.

When 33,161 people vote against a particular category of development, and the final planning controls still permit that category of development, what exactly counts as successful consultation?

The Government can point to its engagement records.

The community can point to the ballot box.

THE GOVERNMENT DIDN'T IGNORE THE COMMUNITY.

IT PUT THE OBJECTIONS ON THE PUBLIC RECORD BEFORE PROCEEDING.

SHIRE BOSSES | SATIRE. The Community Listening Centre and its attractions are fictional. The Council advisory poll, State Government exhibition and finalised rezoning are separate real events. Rezoning does not constitute development approval.

COFFS LOCAL CRACKS EGG. EGG CRACKS BACK.A perfectly normal Coffs Coast morning until someone cracked an egg for brekkie ...
11/10/2026

COFFS LOCAL CRACKS EGG. EGG CRACKS BACK.

A perfectly normal Coffs Coast morning until someone cracked an egg for brekkie and the bastard LOOKED BACK.

Two black eyes. No yolk. Just some free-range demonic s**t.

Screaming ensued. Egg hit the deck. Breakfast cancelled.

What in the actual f**k are the chickens laying around here?

The Department is requesting an exorcist with experience in poultry.

Shire Bosses is now offering breathwork facilitation. $75 per session. Inhale disappointment. Exhale nothing.No refunds.
11/10/2026

Shire Bosses is now offering breathwork facilitation. $75 per session. Inhale disappointment. Exhale nothing.

No refunds.

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Coffs Harbour, NSW
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