Jacqueline Holds Space Toronto

YOUR PRESENCE IS THE PRESENT. Happy Sunday, I'm preparing for my weekly Hospice Reiki visit by being rested, grounded, calm and open-hearted. This type of presence is what is required to be able to witness deep emotional pain with others. It is a gift for both my client and myself to spend this time together

Excited to share our second lecture at the Kimel Family Centre-Baycrest, in partnership with the Home Hospice Association!
Our focus was on Living and Dying Well, and we drew beautiful inspiration from Mitch Albom’s Tuesdays with Morrie (and loved being able to give away a copy to a member of our community!).
Morrie’s final thesis was simple: facing our mortality is actually the key to living a more meaningful life.
But how do we actually navigate that path?
As an end-of-life doula with a background in holistic coaching, this is exactly where my work begins. While a traditional healthcare system focuses on the physical illness, a holistic doula looks at the whole person. By combining coaching tools with compassionate end-of-life care, I help individuals:
• Navigate the emotional and spiritual transitions of aging and illness.
• Process fears and find deep, intentional peace.
• Co-create a legacy plan that honors how they want to live and how they want to be remembered.
It is a privilege to bring this holistic approach to our community. Thank you to everyone who came out to listen, share, and reframe how we talk about life's final chapter. 🤍

Last Thursday, I had the honor of delivering Part 1 of a 4-lecture series at the Kimel Family Centre - Baycrest, in a wonderful partnership with the Home Hospice Association.
Our core message was simple yet profound: helping individuals and their family & friends navigate end-of-life mindfully, can bring greater meaning to the journey.
-of-lifeCare

We plan for the birth, the wedding, the retirement. Why do we skip the finale? Most of us spend more time planning a vacation than we do discussing end-of-life values. Nicole Kidman's recent move into Death Doula training isn't just a headline, it's a wake up call for the "death avoidant" culture we live in. As Nicole recently highlighted "there is a profound need for for a different kind of support -- one that centers on presence, dignity, and the messy reality of being mortal". End-of-care isn't just a medical event, it's a human one. In my lived experience and training with Home Hospice Association, I've seen what happens when families are left to navigate the "business of dying" without a map. Hiring a Death Doula can help families with navigate the dying process and help them feel comfortable, supported and informed.

A Day in the life of an aspiring Death Doula:
Holding space for a dear friend and her Son as he says goodbye to his Cat Companion of 20 years. Safe journey Marcello 💛

I agree with Gabby and how she describes being present for another and holding space.

I was recently asked, “Gabby, what do we do when faith is such a powerful presence, and when a healthcare worker feels compelled to bring it into the room? How do we support those we work with who have strong beliefs, as well as those who don't, while still protecting the sacredness of the bedside?”

This is not a simple question, because belief can be both deeply personal and deeply influential, especially in moments of vulnerability. For many, faith is not something they put on and take off, it is woven into how they show up in the world. And finding the line between honoring that faith and honoring the person in the bed is a tender balance.

Every healthcare worker walks into this work carrying something invisible. For some, it is a deeply rooted faith and devotion. For others, it can be uncertainty, or even distance. The spectrum is wide, and all of it is human.

But here is what I teach, over and over again:
What we believe is ours. What they believe is theirs.

And in healthcare, especially at the bedside, those lines matter.
I cannot tell you how many times I have heard well-meaning healthcare workers say, “I will pray for you,” or “Trust God, you will be okay.” The intention comes from a compassionate place, but intention does not erase assumption.

Spirituality in healthcare is not about bringing our faith into the room, it is about bringing our presence. It is about knowing ourselves well enough that we don’t unconsciously impose our beliefs on someone who may be questioning everything. Especially at the end of life, when fear, anger, doubt, and grief surface in raw and unpredictable ways, our role is not to correct, convince, or comfort with doctrine.

Our role is to listen. To create a space safe enough for someone to whisper, "why is this happening?" Or to be able to say, "I am afraid. I am angry. I don’t believe anymore.” And what I witness most often, is the curiosity in those last hours to days of wanting to know more, wanting to understand, asking questions about the why of it all, without having a faith background.

We are not there to answer those questions. We are there to witness them.

That kind of spiritual care requires humility. It requires restraint. It requires deep self-awareness. And yet, we must also have something that sustains us personally as well. We regularly stand at the threshold of life and death. We hold hands at last breaths. We sit in rooms heavy with goodbye. If we do not have a framework, spiritual, reflective, and grounding, that supports us, this work will hollow us out.

So yes, bring your faith. Bring your questions. Bring your grounding practices. Just don’t place them at someone else’s bedside. Spirituality in healthcare is not about religion, it is about reverence, for the human experience unfolding in front of us.

If they ask you to pray with or for them, step forward gently, you have been invited. But until that moment, let your faith steady your hands, not your words. Let it guide your compassion, not the direction of the room. We are guests in sacred spaces that belong to someone else’s story. Our responsibility is not to lead the spiritual narrative, but to protect it, and to wait until we are welcomed into it.

And if we are asked to pray but do not know how… if we are met with spiritual questions that stretch beyond our own understanding… that, too, is sacred information. It is not a failure to admit we are not the right person for that moment.

I have learned in this work when to step forward and when to step back. Sometimes the most compassionate response is to gently place those fears, those questions, and those uncertainties into the hands of someone trained to hold them, a hospice chaplain, or someone whose calling is spiritual guidance.

Not every role belongs to us, and recognizing that is part of honoring those in the bed, as well as those at the bedside.

xo
Gabby

You can find this blog here:
https://www.thehospiceheart.net/post/spirituality-in-healthcare

"Jacqueline has been an incredible support, helping me to reach into my inner self, to listen to my body, and find a way to accept and even embrace my situation with a new inner strength. After each session, I feel renewed confidence in my ability to move forward and make the most of the time I have left. I can't thank you enough"
It is a privilege to provide weekly sessions with this client who has a rare terminal regenerative disorder. Our sessions are filled with grace

HAPPY CANADA DAY! CELEBRATING THE TRUE NORTH STRONG AND FREE ❤️

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I enjoy helping people build a relationship with their authentic selves

Read more: yungpueblo.substack.com

I'm hosting a Death Cafe April 4, 1-3pm @ Toronto Public Library, Highland Crescent branch 3550 Ellesmere Rd
Come join us!