Scottish Family Party

Lucas's wife, Mairi, said, "Richard often gets bargains on Gumtree, so when he came home in a new Lamborghini QSV Speciale V12 (RRP £396,987), I just assumed someone around the corner was getting rid of one to make more space in their garage. I was not suspicious at all."

SFP Treasurer, Euan Morrice, issued a statement: "When I was told that I was not allowed to see the accounts, I just assumed someone had mislaid them. Maybe slipped down the side of a sofa. I was not suspicious at all."

SFP Deputy Leader, Phil Holden, said, "When I asked about the finances in a team meeting, Richard screamed at me to 'SHUT UP and stop asking questions!' I just assumed he wanted to get on to other agenda items. I was not suspicious at all."

Agnes McKay, who donated £100 to the SFP from her modest pension, has asked for a refund. SFP Chairman, David Richardson, speaking from his yacht in the Mediterranean, responded, "We're all victims of this - especially me. What you should really do, Agnes, is give us even more money as we need it more than you do."

Deputy Chief Constable Katie McMillan has promised that the investigation, codenamed Operation Twigshape, and prosecution will be concluded just BEFORE the next election, as it's not the SNP.

Lucas, speaking from his apartment in Monaco, said he would cooperate fully with his mates at Police Scotland, especially those hoping for promotions in the future.

**** That's all untrue, of course. No one would believe a story like that! ****

Westminster "Summer of S*x" from ages 0-18! Richard Lucas interview with Tony Rucinski WESTMINSTER’S “SUMMER OF SEX” – FROM 0 TO 18Dear marriage supporter,Last time I sat with Richard Lucas, leader of the Scottish Family Party, we went through ...

Swinney's s*x ed exposed with Tony Rucinski of the Coalition for Marriage.

Westminster "Summer of S*x" from ages 0-18! Richard Lucas interview with Tony Rucinski WESTMINSTER’S “SUMMER OF SEX” – FROM 0 TO 18Dear marriage supporter,Last time I sat with Richard Lucas, leader of the Scottish Family Party, we went through ...