11/10/2026
If you’re experiencing the ‘4 O’clock’ meltdowns at home, this one is for you.
Emma is an ex foster carer, adopter, Social Worker and specialist in Autism and ADHD. She has experience supporting children and young people with neurodivergence both professionally and within her own home.
As part of her role, Emma supports foster carers who are experiencing difficult behaviours at home. She can also complete sensory profiles for children and young people, helping us understand how they process their surroundings and what strategies and environmental changes may support them.
In this video, Emma shares her experience of the ‘4 O’clock’ meltdown. When a child has held everything together throughout the day and then struggles to regulate once they get home.
“It’s really difficult and we are all human. I’ve made mistakes, I’ve done the shouting at them back before. It doesn’t work… they shout back louder.”
“As long as they are safe, and you are safe, the best strategy in those situations is controlled ignoring. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done as a Mum, because that changed all my morals and values of parenting my birth children. It’s about picking at battles and not every little thing, or you spend your whole day picking at things and it’s just miserable”
Emma also shares how, over weeks and months, the length of the meltdowns reduced from 2–3 hours to just 10–15 minutes, and the severity of the behaviours began to reduce.
The aim isn’t perfection. It’s understanding what’s underneath the behaviour, choosing your battles and finding strategies that work for that child.
The full video is on our Youtube. The Link is in the comments below 👇🏼💙
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